Third 'MIB' Outing Ends Series on Weakest Note

After a decade-long hiatus, the MIB franchise goes in a brand new direction - back in time.

Men in Black 3 was simply doomed from the start, desperately attempting to reacquaint moviegoers (or more-so subject moviegoers) to what was already an outdated and lifeless franchise. Times have certainly changed since the late 90s as has the quality of cinematic competition. Will Smith just doesn’t have the star power that he had a decade ago with his trio of revolving summer blockbusters: Independence Day, Men in Black, and Wild Wild West.  

And Tommy Lee Jones is no better off, straying from his slew of Oscar-bait performances for the sole purpose of revisiting campy nostalgia. Back as MIB Agents J and K, Smith and Jones once again don their signature black suits and Ray-Bans ready to take down intergalactic criminal, Boris the Animal (Jermaine Clement) hell bent on altering the space time continuum. So far, the plot doesn’t sound too bad, a bit derivative, but surely not dreadful. After all, Back to the Future and Austin Powers are deep in the time-travel genre and look how it enhanced those franchises.

With Men in Black 3, the very first scene was the most blatant sign that the ten year hiatus between part 2 and 3 should’ve been indefinite. Imprisoned at a high security moon prison for the past 40 years, Boris the Animal (who’d perfectly fit amongst the campy gadget-limbed faces in Wild Wild West) has been plotting his revenge on Agent K, only to escape in the most ridiculous fashion and from there, the asinine plot begins to snowball. To prevent his lengthy prison sentence, Boris time jumps back to 1969, killing a less seasoned K. 

With the space time continuum altered, J follows suit, going back in time with a few days leeway to hunt down Boris and reset the timeline. Time travel isn’t the problem here; in actuality, it’s one of the more promising elements this third installment has to offer. We really aren’t invested in the quantum details or the possibilities of multiple universes, but the fact that the timeline is screwy and it has to be fixed for the story to resolve itself. The problem that Men in Black 3 faces is making the least out of an unfunny, disjointed story.

After 15 years of fighting cheese ball rendered aliens, you’d think that J and K would have a much tighter bond than the lack of that we see for the little time Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones have together onscreen. Yes, very little time as the plot dictates a twist on the relationship as Smith teams with Josh Brolin, assuming the mantle of K (or a “younger” version of K). Jones’ presence in the film is more of an aside and with his No Country for Old Men co-star stepping in, there’s no need or place for the dull, seasoned character. 

Even when the first Men in Black hit theaters, it was more a star vehicle for Will Smith than anything. This won’t do wonders for Brolin, but casting him here isn’t about making him a star, but rather finding the perfect actor to emulate Jones, which he surprisingly tackles exceptionally well. Brolin has his present day counterpart down pat, almost too good for a movie such as this. Smith and Brolin function on workable chemistry throughout the final hour, taking on cliché after cliché of an era of free love and ignorance. Shoehorning in the moon landing or a moment with Andy Warhol (Bill Hader) and doesn’t satisfy in creating a genuine 1960s atmosphere. The fact that it’s there, because people cling to blatant reminders of the era is insulting, not innovative.

The stakes for changing the past aren’t as high as they should be, due to Barry Sonnenfeld misusing any redeeming qualities this installment might have had with sloppy plotting and obnoxious humor from one Michael Stuhlbarg. Despite all of the shoddy special effects and one-liners, the movie wouldn’t be as half bad as it is if it wasn’t for Stuhlbarg’s precognitive alien, Griffin. Griffin is the definition of an utter annoyance, continuously babbling on about every possible outcome in such a creepy mellow tone. Stuhlbarg was fantastic in A Serious Man and Hugo, and it’s a shame to see him relegated to such a horrible role. 

Villain Boris the Animal doesn’t come off as equally annoying, but his character is never given the chance to fully develop outside the generic revenge plot device and goofy getup straight from the reject costume department. The fact that he’s not constructed as a formidable villain weighs down the climatic green screen showdown even more. Granted, Men in Black 3 isn’t intended on being the smartest blockbuster of the summer season, but there’s a fine line between a blockbuster with that shock and awe value and one churned out just for the sake of capitalizing on a franchise’s name. The fact that it took a decade to come up with this, and this was the best that Barry Sonnenfeld and company came up with. And except for RV in 2006, Sonnenfeld’s slate has been empty these past ten years. Deep within the recesses of Men in Black 3, there are moments, all lodged in the middle act, where the movie was on the ball and could transcend cheesiness and go back to its roots. But one bad joke and one-liner after another, it simply derails.

If Men in Black 3 is to be the final installment of the series, it’s wrapped up appropriately and succeeds where many final installments struggle at trying to be the grandest of the trilogy in terms of scale. It never feels bloated, even as it periodically lags throughout its 106 minute length. But even wedging in beneficial time travel devices and Josh Brolin doesn’t wholly excuse the countless missteps along the way in creating this unnecessary cash grab. Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones have evolved beyond what this franchise has had to offer and right now it’s much better to just fizzle out than go through the cycles for a fourth installment or a reboot. 

GRADE: D+ (3/10)

This review is also available on Blu-Ray.com